As the saying goes “pride comes before a fall” well today I respectfully disagree.
For me, my fall was a long time ago and while I may still be heading towards the ground, I can sit back today with a sense of pride at my achievements over the past five months.
This is a big deal for me because one of my biggest issues with depression is the feeling of being a failure, self loathing is one of my specialties so please allow me this luxury because it’s a massive step for me.
Five months ago I was at rock bottom and ready to throw my life away.
Since then I have done the following:
- Admitted I needed help and got it
- Started writing this blog.
- Continued with the blog, this will post #111
- Given up Mafia Wars! (I never thought that day would come)
- Wrote and published a book
- Sold 20 copies of book!
- Had an idea for a book of poetry and actually following it through
- Started writing another book
- Found God
- Made lots of new friends, people like Weegee and Bourbon especially from WordPress
- Attended a training day for peer support, being in a room with complete strangers!
Read that list and weep depression!
That is not bad going in 5 months is it?
The point is that it is OK for you to look bad with a sense of pride, if only you allow yourself to see how much you have achieved.
Why not do what I have done and make a list to see what you have managed in the past year, it may surprise you and when you feel low you can look back it and remember how far you have come!